As many of you know, I recently wrote an article for Thrillist about New Orleans strip clubs. The assignment was to create a strip club guide for New Orleans – for tourists and locals alike. Not everything made the final cut, so I present you… the shit you didn’t see!
Winner: Stiletto’s, Lipstixx (tied)
*Cue Jimmy Fallon “Thank You Notes” music*
“Thank you, Stiletto’s, for being just like a brothel – but cheaper. Much. Cheaper.”
You don’t need to ask why you ended up at Stiletto’s or Lipstixx. You know why. It’s so you can hear the greatest words ever in a strip club: “no, we don’t need a champagne room to do that.” #Winning
As the Thrillist article will tell you… if your idea of ballin’ is breaking a $20, you’ll love Stilleto’s. Otherwise, there’s no reason to visit either club unless you’re looking for [illicit activity redacted] on the cheap.
Insider Knowledge: you’ll spend more money at Lipstixx for a VIP room than you will at Stiletto’s. At Lipstixx, you’ll be pressured to tip the VIP hostess before your time starts. Of course you can say no, but understand this is the person you’re depending on to look the other way when… well, you want her to look the other way. Denying her a tip could make the whole VIP room a giant disappointment. (NOTE: I’m pretty sure the same holds true for Scores or Temptations, but I can’t remember for certain if you’re asked to tip the hostess or not.)
Elementary schools used to do tours of the former Charity Hospital to give students a glimpse of public healthcare. They should do that with these clubs. It could serve as a PSA for what happens when strippers stay in the biz for a little too long.
Guests will enjoy such treats as the bartender/manager confidently auctioning off one of the dancers for well below MSRP. Or an overweight stripper blowing smoke in your face and asking if you’re ready for “some fun”. Pass.